Repaying Affection

I had a very very long conversation with my family( parents & bro) today, later part of conversation turned nostalgic. My role model is my dad, he is a teetotaler and i have never seen him raising his voice against my mother, neither my mother. When i have kids, i would always love to be like him to them. I have never let my parents down. I have always made them proud of what I have done.I always thought i have been a good son to my parents but never a good brother. It starts from the time my little brother was born, i was 3 1/2 years old then. I remember till date, I cried by lying under the cot asking my parents to throw my little brother in garabage bin. I dint want share my undue affection what i was getting from my parents with my brother. I dont remember anyone explaining about the soon to be born little brother to me.

He has always shown un-due affection on me. If he gets a choclate( candy), he will bring it home without eating and share it with me. He was smart to ask for another choclate for me, if they have one more. I have always fought with him from small things to big things. People would laugh if they know that , i use to fight right from who gets the first dosa(rice pan cake) to who gets the big omlette. My mom was so smart that she use to make dosa in two pans at the same time, so that both are the first dosas :). My brother always liked to stay with me but i acted as if like i never like his company. During summer vacation time i use to stay in my cousins house for 10 days. My brother cannot stay away from my parents during his young age so my dad use to hide me under the bed or something and then take him home. He use to search all over my cousin's house and then leave with my dad dejected.
We always fight for TV remote but he was so nice to give it for me every time. I dont remember a single instance of him watching the channel what he wants when i am there :(. I was headstrong and arrogant during my childhood days but he was always caring and down to earth.

I remember him being so excited of my 10th, +2 results and when i was attending my job interview in cognizant. I dont think i have ever repayed the kind of affection what he has showered on me. Only time when i acted like a good brother for him was helping him out in chosing on what he wanted to study in college. I understand things better now( atleast i think so) and i realise that how good he was to me. Hope i repay that affection at some point of time in the life.